Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Great one liners - Write on Wednesday

I couldn't decide which I liked better so I'm posting two :)

1) It's been years - long, devouring years- since my soul felt the cold, yet here it is in the form of your face.
2) You are the feeling of a roller coaster, excitement laced with anxiety, as we ascend and quickly fall.

8 comments:

Kerry said...

I think I like the first one better. It's darker, but more descriptive, yet still leaving more to the imagination.

Melinda Chapman said...

I loved both of these! They conjure up great imagery as well as deliver the emotion eloquently. :)

Jaimee Hunter said...

I love the second one!

Janelle said...

I love, love the second one. What a great description of an emotion!

Lolamouse said...

I think I'm partial to the first, but they're both great!

Lene said...

I love both of these. The emotion in each one is just beautiful.
Well done in writing two...I had enough trouble with just one!

By the way, I've just nominated you for a Versatile Blogger Award. Pop over to my page to check it out!

Anonymous said...

I like the first one. Long devouring years confuses me though: isn't it good that your soul hasn't seen the cold until now? Wouldn't those years therefore be good, not long? Can I suggest you take out 'long devouring years'. I think its a lot stronger without it.
I do like the term though, you should definitely use it again in your writing.
Well done.

InkPaperPen said...

I like the first one. The ending was great. Cold in the form of a face. Great work!

Gill x