Saturday, January 28, 2012

Being (Staying) Away aka Does This Count?


    It's been so long since I posted! I've been having a dry spell in which I tried to write but came up empty. While I sat at my desk squeezing the life out of words that wouldn't get along with each other I reached the big one-eight, which inevitably led to a gazillion dinner dates (comes with the territory of having a large family and indivdually going out with them to have an officially grown-up talk), moments in which I tried to make myself feel like an adult, panic attacks at my failure to do so, and trying to quit thinking I'm still a teenager (technically I am but you know what I mean). Did I mention I don't feel like an adult at all? Frankly that scares me because I feel as if I should go do something important. It's sad really. I hate to say it but I wish I could rewind to my thirteenth birthday. So, my wise advice to everybody is: Don't do what I did and realize too late that the time between 13 and 18 is a time to sow not reap.
    Regarding my dry spell, I keep telling myself, "I will participate in Write on Wednesday this week. I will!" And then I never do. Then I tell myself, "Saturday is coming, get a move on your OSI poem!." But Saturday comes and goes and no poem. I could go on and on about the things I meant to write that never became a reality but what's the point? Anyway, I edited some old stuff (ok maybe it was just one paragraph) that I hope counts as writing (it's part of the process no?), but other than that I wrote nothing new.This thing that comes on a whim isn't really writers' block. I've had that before and it's different. No, this is more like I-have-an-idea-and-a-billion-days-later-I-still-haven't-been-able-to-put-it-to-paper. It's a real disease, I swear.

7 comments:

Kenia Santos said...

Some people say you must write everyday if you want to become a writer. It doesn't have to be good stuff, but thoughts you'll later use or discard, no matter what. Bad writing helps declutter your mind and makes space for good writing.

Happy belated birthday, Laura. Enjoy 18 but let it not become heavy on your shoulders, reaching legal age has nothing to do at all with becoming an adult. I'm 33 now, still a child. :-)

Kiss you girl. <3

Laura Maria said...

I'd never thought about writing every day as decluttering. For me I think it only aids in my bad writing but I will give it a shot since it seems to be what all good writers recommend.
We covered this in my poem about growing up didn't we? My real problem is I want to differentiate between childishness and child-likeness.

nothingprofound said...

Laura, what is writing? Should it be a pleasure, a joy, or a cause for anxiety? Do it if it makes you happy, but don't become obsessed with it. 18-how wonderful! So many adventures ahead-savor every one of them.

Mikha said...

What can I tell you? You know, my english is far from perfect but i'll try to write something.
I mean... like I've been too in "dry spell" and try and try to write SOMETHING and ended up making drawings in the paper... and you feel all like... don't know... hard to explain, It's cool to know that I'm not the only one with "dry spell" (the first time a read that), the last time I didn't knew what to write, I just carried my notebook everywhere and then suddenly short "ideas" keep coming and I just wrote them down and in the end made a nice "thought" :)

Rachel Hoyt said...

Writing comes when it comes. While I agree that writing every day is good, sometimes the idea we want to write about won't come. If you can, write about something else to try to dislodge your thoughts. If you can't, read. Reading things like what I want to write always helps me. Lastly, try not to think about wasted time. Some of us need more time feeling the highs and lows of life before we can write. I started quite late... but I don't think I was late at all. :)

Grace said...

I start by doodling and writing words, phrases on paper, everyday. Sometimes it doesn't mean anything; sometimes it doesn't have anything to do with the prompt. Trust that the words will come..
I hope that you will find your muse again ~

All the best ~

booguloo said...

I try and listen to music that you can actually hear the words and pluck out ideas as they come. I've had one refrain open up three different poems.